What? Huh? I'm awake, I'm awake!!

Work is getting crazy again. Both secretaries are off today, so the last thing they told me at work yesterday was, "You've got to come in tomorrow. Absolutely. The only reason not to be here would be if you were in the hospital."

Famous last words. I went to bed last night at 9:30, then got a call from one of BB's friend's mother. So then I went back to bed around 10:00. Around 10:30-11:00 Jerrod comes into the bedroom holding Molly, who sounds funny. Barky, even. And she smells poopy, so I take her into her room and change her. But she's crying/barking, and when I look at her to give her words of soothing comfort, I realize she looks a bit blue around the lips and nose. So - off we go to the Emergency Room. Where we stayed until 3am. Turns out she has croup. They gave her a steroid shot, two breathing treatments, and a prescription for Orapred. By the time we got home and into bed it was 4am. I got up for work at 6am. And Molly was crying, and a bit barky again.

Oh, and while we were there, Ian called. Around 1am he woke up to a nosebleed all over his pillow and sheets. And I wasn't there for him. I know he's a teenager and can sort of take care of himself, but still, my poor baby (teenager)!

So, now here I sit, tired, waiting for the pediatrician's office to open, half-lidded eyes staring at nothing. Dreading the words that I know are going to be coming out of my mouth, "I know you said it was gonna be a big day, but I have to leave......" I feel guilty for leaving work, and I feel guilty for feeling guilty about taking care of my baby. I think that's the only part the 'women's libbers' didn't take into consideration, and it's a bitter pill to swallow. Shit.