Parenting is full of s*

Surprises. Parenting is full of surprises. And surprising questions. (*You thought I was gonna say “sh!t”, didn’t you?)

Yesterday morning, on the way to school, BB asks me a question. “Did you and Daddy have the s-word when you had me?” I can only assume she means in order to have her, not WHEN I had her, haha. So I said “do you mean sex?” to which she nodded her head. I answered her honestly, and she replied with “Gross. You only did it once, right?” I explained to her that we have 3 kids, so she said “oh, then you only did it 3 times, right?”, to which I replied, “yes, we have had sex 3 times”. Not really a lie, more an omission of facts, right? Because I'm not going to discuss my sex life with my six-year-old daughter. I’m not even gonna tell you about the conversation we had about the Virgin Mary last night after dinner. Needless to say she was very disappointed that "virgin" in that context relates to sex.

As if that wasn’t enough “sex talk” with my offspring, this happened last night as well: Ian asks to use my computer last night, which is fine (his is out of commission). He’s goofing around, looking for info about Shakespear (!) and then goes to youtube. Next thing you know, he’s asking me about a particular video I’ve never heard of and he can’t find on youtube. He overheard some kids at school talking about it. On youtube he can only find REACTIONS to the video. So I’m thinking, he goes to private school, I assume the kids all come from good families, should be okay right? Hmmm…so I look and can’t find it on youtube either. Then I google it. Holy cow!!! It’s a porn site, I think. I couldn’t even get far enough to determine that, I'm not sure if the participants were dressed or not - that's how bad it was. This was the most disgusting thing I’ve ever seen. I don’t know how much worse it got than what I saw, I couldn’t watch the whole thing. Needless to say, he didn’t get to watch any of it. I’m not linking it here, it was that gross. If you really want to know, call me.

Luckily, at this point in her life, all Molly can say is “Foo-Foo” (the babysitter’s dog), “uh-oh”, "that", and various family member’s names. Although, when she says “poo-poo”, then parenting IS full of sh!t, too!